There are horrors of war here but they’re largely glossed over (people die off camera and there’s loads of mud but not much blood) in favour of horse acting that actually serves to distance you from his’ plight.
Everything else does its job and nothing more, and when the job is to poke fun at the Bond films – a job done seemingly at least once every year and we’ve already had Cars 2 do it – that’s really not enough.
If this took place over say ten minutes that’d be fine, but this is a slow, ponderous film that seems to think we want to spend time exploring every two dimensional cliché as it lurches onto the screen instead of racing by them to the next one.
The story is unashamedly sympathetic towards the apes with their mistreatment being a plausible explanation for their uprising against the humans.
At least all the major characters get enough big moments to satisfy, and the final battle is suitably apocalyptic enough to wrap things up with a solid sense of closure.
Yes, the ham-fisted “comedy” is still here, albeit much reduced (giving lead Shia LaBeouf basically nothing to do but run and yell). Women are largely reduced to body parts to be ogled while “acting” and “face-pulling” are basically interchangeable amongst the more experienced members of the cast.
Cars 2 is still a Pixar film though, at even at their most “we’ve got to pay the rent somehow” there’s still a lot more to enjoy here in this tale of dim bulb tow truck Mater (Larry the Cable Guy) and his racing car best friend (Owen Wilson) as they get drawn into a globe-trotting race and sinister intrigue involving a new form of organic fuel.
Thor (Chris Hemsworth) is then banished to Earth by his father Odin (Anthony Hopkins) while his somewhat oily brother Loki (Tom Hiddleston) promises to take care of things while he’s gone.
Elbowed out of cinemas by bloated CGI-epics and low-budget bromance comedies, the glory days of action movies are firmly in the rear view mirror. Little wonder that Fast & Furious 5 comes as a shock : fast-paced without becoming incoherent and packed with action sequences that don’t need rapid-editing to thrill, director Justin Lin takes [...]
When watching something supposedly jaw‑droppingly sexy it’s unlikely many men think of gunning down a bunch of robots on a speeding train.
Much of this film seems designed to ensure the spotlight stays on the Ford / McAdams double act : Keaton gets little to do, everyone else gets less, and love interest Patrick Wilson seems largely there to make sure we don’t think McAdams and Ford are going to lip-lock.
By only having one target to mock, writer / directors Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer can stick close to the original film’s story, which means this movie actually HAS a story, which automatically makes it better than the slop pile that was Epic Movie.